Write it out.

Greetings for blog post number two on the night.

Someone said something to me tonight. It's not worth noting who said it, or even what they said, but suffice it to say that it was said and that it upset me a great deal.

I sat down for a while with friends and talked about it. I told them I didn't want to be mad, but I was. I didn't feel like I should be upset, but I couldn't help it. I asked them to try to help me down from the anger ledge, and they said some amazing things because they are amazing friends, but I still felt angry.

After everybody left the room, I paced for a while. Still angry. I got in my car and listened to sappy music. Still angry. I drove 45 solid minutes out of my way for my yearly Sheetz run. Still angry.

At some point in my driving, I said to myself "I just don't like the way I'm representing Christ tonight." All things being equal, I probably had every right to be as angry as I was. But why would anyone want to carry that around with them for any extended period of time? It felt like a tremendous weight had been handcuffed to my ankles and I had the keys.

So I came home and wrote a worship song. Truth be told, it's not very good. Chances are no one other than the dogs or I will ever hear it. It is not very likely that we will play it at the Bridge. But in some weird, synergistic moment, when I asked God to take my anger and do something with it, he made a song.

The song itself is about what I was talking about above, about how I didn't like my anger and I wished it could be a bit more productive. But again, I don't think the song itself matters. Tonight, when I was hurting, and when I was down, I turned to God and worshipped him with things that I love doing. And through that process, the anger is gone.

It may not work out that way every time, but tonight at least, I am thankful for God's creative Spirit!

Godspeed, and MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!



doubled said...

Sry, but Lady Gaga?? She is grosser than gross! However Owl City All the way!!!!!! unless its live!(however i guess that makes it an even better album! )